Updated: December 22, 2020
By: Guest Writer, Jessica Leichtweisz, MPS of Changing Minds Online
Many people believe bullying can create scars to last a lifetime. I used to be one of those people. However, I learned that the scars only last as long as you choose to wear them. There is no debating that bullying has as a detrimental effect on a person’s development. It can provoke feelings of inadequacy and fear. Bullying can explain why some adults have failed careers, failed relationships and limited economic success.
If you faced redhead bullying as a child or you are currently experiencing one of the things I just mentioned, I have good news for you. The prospect for your future is only dismal if you choose to define yourself by the false stories that other people told you. Our lives are a direct reflection of the current beliefs we have about ourselves. If your belief in yourself was negatively influenced by bullies, I want you to know that at any given point, you can choose to change your story.
Although many of us would like to, we cannot go back in the past and change what happened to us. However, we can choose today to change our reaction. When we accept full responsibility for the person we are today, we stand in power knowing we have the ability to create a new story for ourselves. We can be anyone we want and no longer have to wear the labels that bullies assigned to us.
This may seem difficult, even far fetched, but know you are capable of more than you may ever realize. For years, I allowed my future to be defined by lies other people told me. Today, I am a successful entrepreneur in the field of personal development.
Here are four strategies I attribute to overcoming redhead bullying:
1. Be forgiving. The first step to healing yourself from the scars of bullying is forgiveness. Make a list of all of the people in your life that have ever said anything negative to you and write a letter letting them know you forgive them. You do actually need to send them the letters, this exercise is for you, not them. This may seem difficult. You may be enraged I would even suggest this. However, as long as you hold on to feelings of anger, you are a victim. Just like it is impossible for light and darkness to exists together, you cannot be a victim and have victory.
2. Use affirmations. Affirmations are a wonderful way to reframe the way we think about ourselves. Most of our thoughts exist in our subconscious and these subconscious thoughts control the level of success we can achieve. By stating affirmation such as “I am beautiful,” “I am worthy of being loved,” and “I am capable of creating the life of my dreams,” we will free ourselves from our limiting beliefs. No matter how silly this may seem and no matter how hard these statements are to believe, this step is an integral part of your transformation. Affirmations will assist you in changing the way you think about yourself.
3. Keep a gratitude journal. When we keep a written record of everything that it is going well in our lives, we are establishing a foundation for seeing the greatness in our lives and in others. This will allow us to attract the people and resources we require to make all of our dreams come true. Focusing on what we are grateful for is one of the fastest ways to change our mindset from self deprecating to self motivating.
4. Give back. Being in service to others is one of the greatest gifts we can ever give ourselves. By helping others we are choosing to come from a place of love. The final step in healing ourselves from the scars of bullying is to look at all people through the eyes of love. When we choose to understand that people are imperfect but the core of who we all are is love, it will be impossible to stay angry at anyone who has bullied. Then, we are free!
At the end of the day, never forget to Rock it like a Redhead and love who you are.
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